Sometimes I feel like I've been an adult all my life. All the stuff of everyday can make me forget I was ever a child and that I had a whole life behind me. There are memories, out of nowhere, that would flash in my mind and remind me that I wasn't always like this. They come randomly, wherever, and whenever--when I'm walking, when I'm working, when I'm crossing the street, getting to my ride, having a meal, drinking coffee--I'd get these flashes of memories of a different life.
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For most of the year, I've minimized my Facebook activity. It started November 2015 when I noticed my newsfeed becoming more political than I was comfortable. I thought the politicization of Facebook would fade after the Philippine election was over. But I was wrong. After the election, if you agree with the President, you're a Dutertard. If you disagree, you're a Yellowtard. Not much of a gray area, as if politics is black and white, or in this case red and yellow. It's as if the President is either a god or the devil. And all along I thought he was human and, therefore, fallible. You can agree on certain things with him and you can disagree without being labelled a certain *tard (mustard?).
On my way to work today, an old, familiar song played on the radio. It was not the original but an even slower interpretation, as if at 5AM I needed to hear lullaby. Nevertheless, the recognition pulled me back to when I used to hum it. I was so much younger then, in high school, seemingly with an entire life ahead of me. I could see myself in the attic of our house watching the sun set over the horizon, an incomprehensible melancholy washing over me.